


Voltron Coma Theory

by ScrotieMcBoogerBalls



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Coma, Everyone is Dead, Gen, Get off my lawn, Lance sucks as a pilot, Theories, This Is the Truth, everyone's in a coma, space is just a black hole, there is no such thing as magical fantasy
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-25
Updated: 2018-10-25
Packaged: 2019-08-07 06:37:29
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 315
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16403195
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ScrotieMcBoogerBalls/pseuds/ScrotieMcBoogerBalls
Summary: The shocking truth about Voltron and the Paladins.





	Voltron Coma Theory

Not many people know this, but Voltron is fake. See, Lance is such a shit pilot he crashed Blue into an asteroid and everyone's in a coma. Allura represents Lance's boner because he wants hot girls, and Pidge wishing she could be a chick again. Coran is wacky because dads are wacky and everyone remembers having a dad! And the mice are Keith wanting pets that can be his friends because he's all alone.

That means Keith being an alien is fake, it's just his brain thinking he is cause he feels lonely and like he doesn't fit in. The Blade of Marmora are his mean foster family who don't like him cause he's got feelings and they don't wanna deal with that.

Rover is Pidge wishing she had friends even though she doesn't want them cause her classmates were dickheads. So is finding Matt, cause Matt is like. idk. Dead or something. Or in jail.

Hunk can cook with alien ingredients cause he's the food guy and he never wanted to be a pilot he wanted to be a chef. Shay means he wants a girlfriend but thinks he's too much of a wuss for real girls so he'll date an alien chick made of rock instead.

And Zarkon and the Black Lion represent Shiro feeling like a fail pilot cause he got captured and lost his arm. The Galra shit is still real DON'T ASK QUESTIONS IT JUST IS OKAY. Or maybe Shiro was in a coma after crashing the ship and all the Galra stuff is his angsty coma dream cause he's dying and stuff.

The whole Kuron fight is obviously Keith's boner for Shiro that he can't fulfill cause Shiro's with Adam. Except not cause Adam dumped him.

Lotor represents spoiled assholes who have parents and don't appreciate them.

Either way everyone's in a coma and Voltron never happened. THE END.


End file.
